42 Skidoo

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Today is my birthday.  42 Skidoo! Hmmm… it just doesn’t have the same ring to it as 22 Skidoo, which to give credit where credit is due is actually a phrase my oldest sister made up when she was 22 years old.

22 was a special time in my life-- I believe I even savored it when I was in it. I was living on my own in the city, making new friends and making my way. I was discovering my career and discovering myself. I was broke, but not in debt. I was seriously dating, but not married. I was young but not a kid anymore. 

Some days I still feel like I’m 22, other days I feel my real age and then some. I’ve been doing a bit of self-reflection over the last few weeks and I've even taken (wasted) the time to dish out my major middle-age complaints to my sisters and best friends (you know the ones-- too much grey hair, ugh to my ever-expanding waistline, the feeling of shock when I look in the mirror or see my photo).

But now, I’m turning the corner and I’ve decided I’m going with the attitude of “Yes, I’m getting older, good for me. It sure beats the alternative.” I doubt I’ll be the type who embraces every wrinkle and age spot (or kinky white hair!) but as time marches on I’m not going to pretend to be younger than I am or ashamed of aging. That’s just a disservice to myself and all the “old” folks in my life.

This past 12 months have been quite interesting for me and my husband. We’ve experienced some very typical middle-age challenges with job issues and health concerns.  We’ve had the chance to make changes in our life together and I am alternately thrilled and freaked out about just how swiftly our world can be rocked while simultaneously our responsibilities keep growing.

When I was 22, I think I would’ve recognized and happily accepted my 42 year-old self and not be too surprised at where I am and what I’m doing right now. But I know for sure she wouldn’t have any inkling of what it took to get here.

As I age I like acknowledging the things I really love, even trivial things. One of those things I love doing is making lists. No one can do it like one of my journalistic idols, Chicago Tribune’s Mary Schmich, or "The Happiness Project's" Gretchen Rubin, but for fun here’s a few things I’ve learned over the last 20 years.

·         Career changes happen for a reason. Look at them positively and move forward.

·         If you have them and you can possibly do it, love and cherish your parents and siblings when they are with you here on earth.

·         Always back-up your computer. Yes we have the Cloud and technology gets better every year, but why chance it?

·         Reading makes life better.

·         Capture life’s moments in real time, not taking pictures you may not have time to sort/organize/review later.

·         If all feels hopeless, get some sleep. Immediately.

·         Coffee is the be-all, end-all elixir when it comes to productivity or coping with 3-7PM during young motherhood.

·         Friends can be just as important as family. Never worry about this and always be open to making new ones.

·         Keep riding your bike. It’s a life-long exercise that delivers freedom and happiness.

·         Be authentic at work, it makes it so much more bearable and less complicated.

·         If I am healthy and my family is healthy, I am truly blessed.

Enjoy your day today. I know I am bound and determined to do the same.

The Best Ever...

“This is the best day ever…” This is the best day of my life…”  Whenever one of my children says one of these phrases, it never fails to make me chuckle. It's one of my favorite kid sentiments. As adults so many of us have put up roadblocks and “excepts” that stop us from letting the best moments sink in.

But I know that I did something right while working for a wonderful boss and company for nearly ten years. I recognized and really honored so many times in the weeks and months while working at Media Options Inc. that I had “the best job ever.”

It was the best job ever for so many reasons. I was lucky enough to experience autonomy, respect, lots of laughter, great minds, travel to interesting places, delicious meals, creativity, excitement, agony, drama, odd moments, little victories, big victories, major losses. Over the last two years since the company closed I’ve often wondered if I’ll ever have that type of work life again.

I and literally hundreds of people around this country have experienced a great loss this week, the passing of founder and chairman of Media Options Inc., Philip Press. It’s too hard for me right now to try to describe the type of person Phil was, but I’ve never met anyone like him and I doubt I ever will again. He was a mentor and great champion to many.

I once told Phil while chatting in his office that working for him was “the best job I ever had.” He smiled big time when I told him this and I remember chiding myself about it a little afterwards… it wasn’t exactly the shrewdest thing to say when I needed to negotiate my position or salary later on.

But in the end, that stuff didn’t matter. Phil and his beautiful, wickedly smart wife Beth became more than my bosses, they became my friends. I knew I could count on them for anything and often did. The two of them have given me countless hours of caring, good advice over the years. When you worked for Phil work wasn’t just a job, it was an experience. He wasn’t always easy on us and he made a point to focus on both your strengths and your weaknesses. He was consistently encouraging.

Last Wednesday was Phil’s birthday and instead of sending him a Facebook message I decided to try to reach him by phone. His life has been extremely full and busy the last few years so I was thrilled when he answered right away. Even though he was on a train he took the time to talk with me for 25 minutes. I will always, always treasure that conversation.

When I hung up the phone I did go on Facebook and posted a message on his wall, something along the lines of “Happy Birthday to the best boss I could ever have (and maybe ever will have).” I remember at the moment thinking it was cheesy but I was sure he’d get a kick out of it. He private messaged me back a wonderful short note just a few minutes later.

When you feel the urge to call someone, write someone, tell someone what they mean to you—just do it, don’t hesitate. Phil did this almost every single time he spoke to his close friends and colleagues over the last few years. That was just one of his outstanding qualities. 

Let every best moment, best experience, best person permeate your being and your soul. Rest in peace dear Phil. You were indeed the best boss I ever had.